Wednesday, 17 April 2013



I hope we are doing great and enjoying the spring... Hmmm *loves*.

This topic is inspired by real life experiences  but what prompted me to write about this. was something I read on BN CLICK. While my title is not exactly based on the article it made me want to share  some ideas.

I am not too sure if everyone understands the meaning of using personal initiative in anything at all.Some of us do not only lack common sense at times we lack the ability to think outside the box /allow ourselves to do things without being told or asked. Personally,I hate when people are unable to use their own initiative like for real, I need to keep telling you everything when you are not two years old???

I have read stories and seen a lot of people that make mistakes, myself included and some of these  mistakes   if not most, could have been so avoided.  While am not a perfect being but a strong advocate for learning as a way of growing up I do believe  using personal initiative and taking responsibility is crucial to development and maturity.

I personally will not date or consciously allow myself to like or indulge with a dude that does not HAVE/USE his initiative. In addition, I will not also allow myself  to be in friendships that the other  does not use INITIATIVE. I don't like being frustrated and I don't like   the feeling  of training someone! its just not acceptable. .. Besides, am still training me by the grace of God jor. lol.

There are five facts I dont like:
1) Never offering help ever. Not even can I get that for you? or would you like me to get you this ?? I am not talking only relationships but in everyday life. E.g. at work, helping a colleague out or offering to serve tea (lol, the UK).  This gesture is a sign of humility if anything at the very least. I know in some instances some people will take advantage  and you will know. Why? They never return the offer or at least try to. I think in situations as such i.e. not to feel like a doormat, I  will consciously cut back or communicate about it esp in a relationship or friendship.

2.) Always taking: I just loath it when people always TAKE, TAKE, TAKE, and keep on taking and never give nothing. Life does not work that way (well in my world), if we all took, took and took we will have nothing in us to give or sacrifice. It is a kind gesture not only to try and give a little back but  it also helps to release  blessings and in return be appreciated and valued. For some of us, we are quick to take and not quick to give. This is an area I had to learn to work on. It is a blessing to me to bless others and be supportive in anyway I can   and I think it is great to say no to things as in  take less where necessary.

3.) Lack of home training: I say this because some of us simply lack the ethos of house keeping, helping around the house or simply being supportive. We simply enjoy others slaving away for us in the kitchen, in the bedroom. in the work place etc. The simple gesture of appreciation is what we lack  and not only is this attitude discouraging its just pure rude and insane for anyone to lack basic home training and expect so much from others. Mtcheewwww....

4.) Lack of responsibility: I hate when people can't/ refuse to be accountable esp when you are SANE.  It is important to understand we are all on a journey so it is expected for us to mess up at some point order to get it right next time. Although, the degree of the mess we make varies, it is essential  we  learn to take responsibility for the mess we have caused and the pain that has affected others as a result. Surely, if you had any ounce of initiative you would have thought twice or three times harder about the decision that created this mess. If you didn't pls own up and don't blame any DEVIL, did he force you or you simply bought the idea that popped in your head?

5.)Lack the ability to think outside the box: The inability to think outside the box i.e. try to do something a little different for the person you love or care about is just plain BORING.  For some people not only do they claim they don't have it in them, they don't even bother to TRY.
TRYING is a start. Nobody expects you to get it right  all the time but when you try, you will  learn and figure it out better next time.

What am I saying: STOP THE EXCUSES and just try to allow yourself to use your own initiative to think outside the box and take the lead.

I am done

I hope to post some more relevant pointers about other topics.

Stay blessed and enjoy the tiny beauty left in this world.

*Sigh*  @ the news, not very encouraging. I pray for strength and grace. x


  1. Read the link DOHK!

    I don't see what caused your ranting in the story. #seriously# It's an everyday story, nothing new.

    But I can read in between the lines and I would let you know I UNDERSTAND perfectly well where you ranting comes from :D

    I hold no-one responsible for my actions except myself and I won't let nobody back me to a corner like a scared mouse! I pick my battles and make sure I win!

    You were MIA for weeks, and you appeared just like that with a scalding rant???..hmmmmm.... issorit!
    Every point NOTED!
    Thanks for sharing dear sister :D

    1. lool @MIA..... forgive me I know its an everyday story but sha I struck some may chords and I guess this came

      Thanks for visiting me love. I have been dead busy sha... I hope to blog some more soon. xx

    2. @simply you mean there's more to this post than she has written.

  2. Ok, this was fiery. The one that exasperates me is not taking responsibility for actions. Please wo/man up and deal

    1. Thank you sister mi... I totally agree o jare.. Very fiery talk about passion spilling out..

      Thanks for visiting hun. x

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  4. Truthfully and clearly spoken. This is why I said you sound like a counsel when you blog. Check out the review I did on your blog on my site!


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