Tuesday, 26 July 2011

Life in Stage ~ My Story~My Life~My Man Cont... 3

Dear Fellow Blog Readers,

My sincere apologies for not updating asap, please forgive me. For anyone that has checked out for new updates and found none, I apologise. I have been quite busy as in busy, my sis wasn't feel well (now much better), meant I had to travel down to help. I was also preparing for my graduation (now done, will share the story and pics some time soon). Apart from that, I have been filling up job application, doing drving lessons etc. So I am determined to give u the rest of the story...

Please relax with a nice mug of Cocoa or Milo (milo hmmmmmm) and enjoy the story...

So I am incredibly grateful to Jonathan for all he has done even as I remember everything so clearly, he means a lot us as a family, a brother, a friend, a husband, a father, a servant and a son. I eventually got to communicate with the love of my life the day I came back home for holiday.  This was after 3years+ of studying abroad, Dad thought I was still doing medicine so he assumed I had few more years to go before I became a graduate.

I was 18 when I left for US and then 2,  came back home for holiday.  I had finished drama school, done internship and now working, yet nobody in my family apart from Aunty Joan and her family knew at the time. I  didn't know who to confide in back home, or how  to tell my dad or any member of family for that matter. I simply decided to go with a plan of coming home, playing happy families and then back to US where I will not set foot in Nigeria till whenever and that whenever in my dictionary was till Dad's death  and when he was about to be buried.. I know its mean but I never felt belonged in my family so I wont miss them neither will they miss me (That was the excuse at the time).

I had been in Nigeria for five days now and the whole excitement had died down, everyone that came to say hello was gone, attention was gone, and I was now simply Joan Kelechi Uzo no American Doctor tag. Even though, the attention and gifts I got from Dad and relatives where lavishing, I didn't feel excited within me at all. It was not that I felt guilty (for some reasons I didn't). I just wasn't  exicted(I guess part of me wanted to see Jonathan again, but it was a just a silly nonsense  so I brushed the feeling away). Although, I knew Jonathan was still working for us, I was yet to see him or meet him again, as he was the only sane person I sort of knew about.

Well, on this interesting Saturday afternoon, after helping with some chores Mum wanted me to do. Guess who I saw playing Ludo with my brother. Jonathan, (How happy was I, well, i didn't know I liked him at the time, but I knew I was just so happy seeing his face). So he was dressed in washed out stones jeans trouser with a blue shirt and playing Ludo with  Charles. As I approached the two of them, Bro Charles looked up and acknowledged my presence, he mentioned my name to Jonathan, asking him he was sure he had met his younger sis, the Doctor of the family. Jonathan looked up from where he was sitting (oooo he had nice long eye lashes, it still stings me in my belly till today). He looked at me with those beautiful eyes and he said, his exact "I am sorry, I have seen her but we have not been introduced". That was when he proceeded to stand up, introduce himself and shake my hands even before Bro Charles could say anything. That was it, I finally met him, I mean officially introduced (I was so excited, I could not do anything but smile..). That was when he said, "You have a sweet smile". (My head was going ding dong, ding dong, ding dong, whatttt...... he actually noticed my smile,  oooo... am happy).. (Then the compliment made me even more exicted, nobody apart from my Aunt in US and some co-workers complimented my smile, they tend to say my smile is beautiful and it makes them want to smile... But I didn't believe them 100% until my Jonathan said it... (I was not on cloud 9, I was on cloud unreachable).

Back to the meeting, my bro decided to leave us to chat as Jonathan was asking about my degree and US. He gestured towards walking to the balcony and I walked by his side (Jonathan was what I would call,a cool Guy..) If you have ever met a cool guy, you will get my drift and understanding..
We talked whilst walking and he kept on asking me about the weather, the food, the people, their culture etc, he seemed so excited and he would smile anytime I said a joke or told a weird. (Like the time a dog decided to run after me cos my bag caught the Frisbee that was thrown towards the dog in the park.. All I knew was a dog running toward me, and myself running for my dear life only to find out 20 mins later of sprinting that he wanted his yellow Frisbee that was caught in my black bag pocket.... It was so bizarre  and I cannot begin to understand how on earth the Frisbee was in my bag. It was hilarious too, everyone kept on point at  me toward the direction of the bag, suggesting  looking into my bag, but instead I thought they meant keep running, there is a safe place. Luckily, I was not hurt but I had never ran so much like that in my life. As I told him the story, I noticed his ears would grin up and down, and his eyes would pop out to show his interest and his smile was just so fixated on his lips that everything was listening to all I was saying. After everything, he laughed out so hard, he had to hold his belly (I love his laughter so much).

Since that day, Jonathan and I became inseparable, I knew his time-table, I knew when he was free, what he would wear, how he would smile, and how he would say hello to me.. After two months of seeing him and being his friend, Jonathan told me one Sunday evening, he had something special to share with him and he wanted to introduce me to his friend. I was quite excited and looking forward to when next he would tell me to come to out and he would drive me to see this friend of his. I didn't  know Jonathan was going to share the best thing that has ever happened to me, accepting JESUS to be a friend, a confidant, an intercessor, my helper, encourager, supporter, deliverer, comforter, healer and provider. That was the night he also shared his childhood stories with me (which is quite long and painful, I hope to share it soon) and how he was able to cope and make something of himself and support his younger sister. During, his hardship was when he remembered how his mum taught him to pray and he prayed and saw the hand of God manifest, that  day he refused to doubt his faith and his believe in what God can do.

He told me to meet with Jesus  that night, and to tell him everything I have been unable to tell anyone and to also let him know that he can come into my heart if only I open and receive his unconditional love. Even though, I asked him loads of questions etc, he tried his best to answer and told me not to be religious about anything. God looks at your heart Joan not your appearance, he sees what is hurting you and making you happy and only he can make every single thing work out for your own good without you stressing yourself or worrying. He is the I am that I am.

Need less to say, that night was a night that I could not hold anything back, I trusted Jonathan and I met with JESUS in my heart, I didn't say anything with my mouth, because I could not trust my mouth to utter anything, so on my bed, I opened my heart and said JESUS if you are real and you really helped Jonathan, come and help me and help my family. I receive you even though, I cannot see you, but I receive you with my heart. I didn't know when I drifted to sleep, but I will share a testimony, that was the first night since I was three that I didn't have any bad dream or nightmare. I just slept like  a baby and it was the best sleep ever, it was so peaceful, I cannot believe I woke up in the same position. I have been having peaceful sleep ever since, unless for the occasional times Jonathan comes to say hello and wipes my tears and encourages me to be strong for him, our love and our children...

So Yes, 20 years since meeting Jonathan, accepting JESUS, alot has changed, I didn't go along with my plan to America. I told Jonathan everything, the truth, and he didn't rebuke me or condemned me, he prayed with me, for me and encouraged me to tell Dad everything. I did, he was upset, but he didn't forsake me or reject me, instead he opened up to me and told me everything (I was definitively shocked), I prayed for him and he felt better. Every night before Jonathan and I got married we all prayed together as a family. My sis came back from the failed marriage, my eldest began to change  from her ways, Mum  took control of her insecurity and emotional issues, my twin sisters  understood what they were doing was not morally right and stopped. Dad decided to beg his friend  that died in the War and forgave himself, as he felt it was his fault he died,  and kept to his promise of helping  his family. He stopped having nightmares, Bro Charles well, he is still insisting he is not gay, he is married with 3 children and says all I saw was not real.. (I know what I saw and I am still praying for him). So yes, Jonathan and I got married after 3 years of courtship and our marriage was beautiful.

He was everything and more and two years into our marriage we were blessed with our first child, Blessing, we called her sunshine mostly because she brought so much love, joy and laughter into our lives. We had two more sons 18 months later named  Isareal and Seth. The boys were so adorable, Jonathan actually received all the names through prayer.

 Yes, we fight, and ramble, disagree, agree, but we never raised our voices over each other, we never disrespected each other in a anyway, we never lied to each other, or say anything negative. We decided earlier on in our marriage to have a points card, anyone who breaks any rule, gets a point, the one with highest point by the end of the year and on certain basis will need to change before the year runs out or the coming year. But, change in a positive, so if I shouted the most, or complained the most and got the highest points, I would need to  make  sure my new year started with a new attitude of less shout, complaints etc. It worked because Jonathan,once had the highest point of constantly being forgetful at locking the store room anytime he took something out or dropped something in. Hence, the constant, mice partying around the food, and me closing it all the time. He had so much point, he decided  he wont be needing a store room outside the house but instead we would sell the house and travel abroad.

That was what we did, 5 years into our marriage we migrated to the UK with Jonathan's work permit to transfer to another branch  to the UK.

I did not regret the decision, I promised my husband, on our wedding day, that where he goes, I would go, his God is mine, his place of worship is mine too, his family are mine own, his ideas are ours etc.

Life in the UK for the next 15 years was great, hectic, busy and we got on with it. We would travel every two years to Nigeria to ensure our children knew their culture and their people. We were average family and we were very thankful to God and happy. Until, the day, my husband came home and said he had being having pains in his groin, and I thought that was weird.

Please stay tuned for the Final Series.....

God is love, love yourself and on others too..

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