The One I met before

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Hello Blogsville,

Its been a while since have done a post on interesting stories... hehe.. so am bringing you the latest..

Relax with a cup of cocoa... actually Milo to be precise and enjoy.. xxoxo

This is the story of Bimpe  and Segun.

I am naturally not someone that likes to talk or entertain stories from random stuff.  That a little intro about me.  I recall when and where  Segun and I initially met and I  would not call it love at first sight..

Rewind back to my college days during A levels. I have a really close sweet friend called Tayo. We call her T, we have been friends since childhood. As the only girl  amongst four boys and  the baby of the house, it can often get lonely and boring although I like my space it can get really BORING.This time around, I decided to spend my Easter holls with my bestie.   We had already planned what we would do and things we will get up to. I was more than looking forward to it, ever since our move outside London, seeing my friend Tayo has been zero due to busy  schedules and tight deadlines. This time around we were  going to make the most of it.

The plans was to stay for 2 weeks and just have fun, fun, fun and a bit of studying. A particular night, I think it was on a Thursday to be precise. Tayo's younger bro wanted chicken and chips and would not stop bugging us. We decided to go to one of their favourites locals. In London  there are so many chicken and chip shops  its quite a miracle   that all of them are still in business despite the increased competition.

We got there  and placed our order,  as we waited, a car drove past, reversed and stopped right in front of the chicken  and chips shop. The dude that  came out of the car,  turned out to be Tayo's friend from school  in fact he was her senior back in Nigeria. He was staring  intensely at Tayo, which  irritated and provoked her to give him a long hard stare, only for her to start giggling and calling his name. Before I could ask why she was giggling, they were both giggling, hugging and talking too. My first impressions  of him were  he  looked unkept..lol. I cant stand dudes that sag, it so off putting. She introduced us and I barely gave him any eye contact.

That was it for me but Tayo would not stop going about him and how humble he is and how  respectful  he was toward ladies blah blah  at school back then. Now, he is at Imperial Uni studying Engineering blah blah. I was totally zoned off. It comes across as if I am uptight well I am actually. I come from a family that first impressions count  and failure to make a positive impression within split seconds, well  let just stay that the person will not be taken seriously. My Dad and Mum brought us that way and it instilled that in our  systems.  Although I try to think am more open-minded.

Back to the story, within the couple of days I had left, Tayo was totally catching up with her new buddy etc  whilst I focused on catching up with revision. Two days before I left for home, Tayo mentioned how  his friend wanted to see us again and that he would like me to be there. She mentioned he said something about me being beautiful and he would like my phone number if I didnt mind. I completely declined without any  further thoughts at all. In fact I was so  keen to get home asap. Tayo on the other hand,  was just so happy to see a friend from her local school and meeting more of them.

It was a year after that episode and off  I went to University and was excited to start and enjoy the experience. Again, this dude was still lingering around and  had asked on several occasions to have my number or facebook name etc. Which I declined, I simply didnt want him  to entertain him maybe there other factors at the time I could not be asked. . But everything changed when I needed his help. I had been struggling with one my modules and it was quite tough I remember discussing my frustration with Tayo who mentioned she will find out if she could help. She later  suggested her friend could help during our conversation. I demanded who the friend was and it was the dude I met last time. I was adamant and completely declined (I could not be asked was my excuse). I really felt I could this and would do it, despite all the help from the lecturers and class mates I just felt my work was not good enough. Two days before the due date, I could not longer contain the stubbornness  I went on facebook looked for him, messaged him and gave him my phone nymber. He didn't call but he replied saying he was busy.

Initially, I thought it was a tactic  but he said he was genuinely  busy. I  had to stress that I desperately needed his help and it would be appreciated and  that my deadline was 42 hours away and am  yet to write something substantial. He eventually called me and we talked, it was kind of weird but anyway we talked, he helped me, I passed and I got a 1st in that assignment and module. I called him, told him the news and decided to treat him to a dinner for helping. I was nervous on the day and that was when I knew I could either have a crush or something is up. We talked about a lot of things, weirdly enough I was relaxed, I really thought I would be uptight and but I was not. We shared a lot in common, he reads, I love reading, he  loves watching movies, he loves comedy, he loves collecting comic books, he loves trebbo lol and I do too.  He  loves mangos, he loves tennis, he loves learning new languages, cashew nuts, etc. In fact, we spent the time talking about our favourite things, movies   and actors and life in general.  It was fun and that day was the beginning  of an amazing friendship.

In my second year of University  he asked me out over a romantic meal on my birthday. I said Yes and it was lovely and we had the most amazing time together. Can I just say my first impression of him didn't change immediately but with time and communication we got there. He didn't sag when we met afterwards and said he was only trying  to do boy boy on that day lol. Whatever the case, I allowed myself to see past that and I felt good about us. I actually took some time out to do some research and prayer. Yes o.  He  opened up to me too and  he thought I was stush and very much on a high horse (I am) lol but he said the time   he decided to hand it over  i.e. the pursuing  was when I contacted him. Nice.

I was in my final year about to start exams when things began to change. Why!! is the question that keeps coming to mind.

I will have to continue next time.

Thank you for reading.

God bless you, JESUS BEST and love best.. xxx

Notions Continue........

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Hello Lovely People,

Notion 2:

I think I have heard many women say that CHRISTIAN BROTHERS are boring.. LMFO.. ahahha  I don’t know about you but some Christians  brothers are not boring including the SPIRIT  filled i.e. spiro spiro ones. Some of them may appear boring based on their looks i.e. clothes but if you get to know some of them they can be witty and fun. It all depends on what you consider as fun lol.

CHRISTIANITY does not stop or impede anyone from having an amazing personality, although you aim not to be of the WORLD (which I think that’s why some people say Christianity is boring). But there are  many Christian activities  that one can engage in and  can find stimulating e.g. reading groups, bowling clubs, football etc etc. You can even invent your own and make it fun for other people to feel comfortable Christian or no Christian. 

Notion 3:

Materialistic world:  is the current world we live in in case you didn’t know or are oblivious. Practically every prayer point is about getting more cars/bigger cars, multiple houses, a bigger EVERYTHING. It is Not about saving the world, sharing the gospel,  saving the poor/dying children, inventing a new medicine to cure cancer, inventing strategic ways to tackle  unemployment/poverty/disease  etc etc.

This is a world where if you don’t have the latest thing you are probably ermm ancient. Consequently, for some of us we love to compare ourselves with other PEOPLE, as a result our motives behind our prayer  points is associated with MORE  and MORE material things to oppress so and so.  It no longer has anything to do with God, celebrating the light in us etc etc. We are too busy comparing, contrasting and counting other people blessings that our own qualities and beauty suffers because as far as we know our little minds cannot dream big and appreciate our worth. Not only do we pray selfish prayers, we also look to other humans as gods to reach out to. Does this make sense?

Well let me elaborate, for some of us, we are moved by what we see hence we want it NOT because it is good for us but because we see it, our eyes WANT IT and so we will GO out of our way to GET IT. In doing so, we fail to anticipate or simply * disacknowledge * the costs, the consequences and potentially the hidden truth that is often not discussed.  When we get there, it sometime becomes too late to get OUT.

 You do not understand?

Some of us are JUST PLAIN GREEDY AND WE LOVE IT (But it’s sad because there are always consequences for EVERY ACTIONS be it indirect or direct).

Note: Am not saying we should not ask God for blessings. The thing is, well my believe is, he has already blessed us maybe a) We need to change our mentality, blessings does not have to be in form of material things. b)Maybe all we need to do is just ask for  direction from the Lord to use our talents and qualities to attain the riches he has promised us (knowing fully well that his riches are everlasting and it can never finish).

P.S. : Disacknowledge is a made up word… lol.

In conclusion, life is a learning process, NOBODY has it EASY.

God is good in the good times and bad. 

Notions

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Hello PEOPLE,

Shout out to the blogsville family…

Thank you to old and new followers, readers, silent and non-silent visitors  lol.xx

Not exactly feeling great at the moment after reading one of the blogsville fam post (P.E.T. PROJECT)I really don’t know what to say which is very unusual, but sometimes I find silence is not such a bad thing. It doesn’t mean you don’t care but it just seems right at the moment, nonetheless a word of encouragement is better most times.

I pray for grace for us all to live and fulfil our purpose on this EARTH. AMEN. As long as we have achieved purpose then it’s not so bad, in as much as it hurts our family and even the departed, at least we have done our part. (Although, achieving purpose is questionable and possibly subjective/ debatable).

I have been doing a lot of thinking, actually I have done a lot of thinking and probably still doing. I think I have come to an understanding if not a conclusion that many notions/ideas are quite interesting if not alarming in some cases.

Notion1: The idea that some people will do anything ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING to get married is one that I find not only amusing but mentally disturbing. To starts off with, the human attention we crave for i.e. partner, spouse etc is normal but some of us are extreme because not only do we want it all i.e. a spouse, children  etc etc we will do anything or are willing to do ANTHING  within our POWER to get it.. WHY? Is my question, is that the ONLY thing we should be striving for? Seriously.  It got me thinking, so after all that shouting, prayers, fasting, visiting pastors for deliverance, meeting with witch doctors, binding the devil, doing online/offline dates all in the name of finding the ONE. What if the “one” in quote comes and he dies tomorrow, what if?? What do we do then? Or better still he comes and his manhood is chopped OFF, (Godforbid) but am sure there are people with stories like these oo, or how about if he has AIDS or she has  a disease or something…  For me, I think the craziness is becoming too much and concerning because it seems to me some of us are making these mere mortals our gods well prominent gods. 

Note:  Am not saying we should not daydream or desire for a partner, but am saying the motives is questionable and the things/sacrifices some of us are willing to make is just scary.

The fact that some of us think our partners have or should I say have   supernatural powers to maybe cure our loneliness or issues or maybe help fill the VOID is not only alarming, or disturbing. It is PURELY IMPOSSIBLE and so UNFAIR on the other person. Why: should anyone be responsible for your own happiness and wellbeing in the case of a partner, why should a mere man/woman have such a BURDEN that they are made to live and breathe YOU? Lol Nobody in this planet can fulfil you if you are not FULFILLED AS A PRESON. WHY: As humans we are constantly changing and growing and what we like yesterday can become today’s issue.  Besides, the world around us is constantly changing putting pressures on us to match up to certain standards and affluence to an extent. So if you aren’t fulfilled NOW, surely any other forms of fulfilment will be TEMPRORARY and it will be back to SQUARE ONE again. 

To elaborate, we are selfish beings and we will always want although some of us are EXTREME, it does not take away the fact that we are always needy.  So THERFORE, how can we place so much hopes and responsibilities on that ONE PERSON that is a mere mortal,  that can die anyway or RUN AWAY when it becomes too much. I think we should just aim to keep working on us and let it be o jare.

TO BE COntinued.....

EACH TO THEIR OWN.

God is good in the good times, bad times  and ugly ones. 

The Marriage Advisor !!!

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 Hello Sweet cakes,

Yes you.. lol.

So my weekend was fun,  packed with loads of bonding with Mum (she came to spend some time with me). Phew, it is not easy running around cooking, getting food, getting told off for not coming my hair (its mine oh). Also  I must indulge in a conversation I rather just not,  plus I had to teach her how to use  the new touchscreen phone she upgraded to. WOW. Its deep/intense. I love my Mum although the emotional blackmail to get what she wants is sooo not fair but I guess it is what it is. We had small fun sha, I told her (future hubby) needs to be prepared cos I foresee you becoming more demanding lol.. She did compliment me, blessed and prayed for me and my older sis. I have been told my hubby is a lucky man ohh, he will be enjoying my cooking (since a good food is a way to a man’s heart etc something along those lines). Lol. Surely, I have more to me than cooking, to which she agreed. Hehe, she is jokes.

Back to the topic of the post, I met with an Aunty (we are not related, just call her AUNTY out of respect). She has a business and sells goodies, bags, dresses, suits etc all sourced from Italy (home of fashion).  Will upload some her of goodies soon on my blog. X. Moving on, I was supposed to help her with marketing and she ended up telling me more stuff than I bargained for.

Nonetheless Aunty F, started with her gist, how we got talking about marriage I don’t know but it was through a conversation and it goes.

Note: this lady is well described as Nitty Gritty, she no send she go talk am as it is.. lol… so you have an idea who she is. Love you SIMPLY MEE.

Aunty F: No marriage is perfect. Anyone that says their marriage is perfect is not happy and is lying. She argues some people in church should not be giving advice if they haven’t gone through the same experience. She gave an analogy, in the UK, they employ people that have/share similar experiences but have risen above situations to counsel others that are going through it. A case of a rape victim, it is likely that sometimes the victim is suppressed/oppressed by the reoccurrence of the situation.  Hence, the counsellor with their experience and techniques can counsel and encourage the victim because they have an idea of what it is like and know what to say. Therefore, some people in church should not give advice in a matter that doesn’t concern e.g. marriage.

I don’t know if I agree with some of her views but I saw where she came from when she mentioned some people do not tell it as it is. Too much holy holy… I guess.

Some of her points were, I think women should be told what to avoid in a man through real life examples.

Aunty F points:

Any man that does not know how to play with a child that comes running towards him or don’t know how to show love i.e. cuddle. HE WONT CUDDLE HIS OWN.

A man that likes to dress, i.e. fashionable, and everything he wears must match all the time. Be sure if you marry such man there will be rivalry and competition in the house. He will always want to outdo his wife and is jealous when his wife buys new clothes etc.

A man that has too many friends, BEWARE. One or two close friends are ok but too many then it becomes too much. This is because his friends will talk rubbish and I when he does mention his wife and her ways, they will be keen to spice the story up and offer useless advice.

A man that loves to PARTY; RUN, because he won’t change for you, it is already in his blood. By the time you marry such man, you will find that you are left babysitting the children all the time. When you do decide to confront him, he will not only remind you but tell you squarely, that you knew this was him before you said YES. “Old habits die hard”.

After courting a man for 8 years and a disappointment. She crossed out her lists and simply wrote RESPONSBILE HUSBAND which she says she has now.

As for me, I questioned her about the 8 years relationship,  why it took so LONG  and yet she missed it? (I am not particularly FOR long relationships past 3yrs or more). She said she was in denial, she felt, where will she start from. She mentioned that they had arranged everything and the day or week to the D DAY, he broke the news he wants OUT. Well, herself and her family ate the cake and enjoyed lool. She is jokes, despite the disappointment she chose to rise above it. It was if she saw it coming, i.e. the disappointment from the guy.

I have always said what you see now with your bf/gf now, multiply  the habits you can't tolerate now by  100 not 10  (when you two marry)  IF YOU CANT HACK IT NOW, PLS RECONSIDER your options cos ermmm it is your own marriage only. If he/she  is violent, no more excuses, if he/she is a cheat no more excuses, if he/she lacks respects no more excuses,  if he/she lacks moral and values no more excuses, if he/she is not fully committed no more excuses.  In  a nutshell, if you know you are living in denial then it’s time to wake up and “smell the burnt okra”. Lol.

But, sha there is nothing prayers can't not do.

I think her advise/points applies to both sexes.

So what do you think?

God is LOVE......

This is for my MUM....

                                         Randomness I enjoy @ work.

                 

The Last WEEKEND....

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Hello Everyone,

How are we?? I hope we are well.

I would like to apologise for the last post. You see, I planned on blogging on a topic at the time. I intended on saving  the title it as a draft as to remind me,  only to mistakenly click the publish button. Anyway, that blog post is coming soon). In the mean time, I will keep you lovelies updated about other stuff. Thank you SIMPLY MEE it was a blog error.. xxx


Ok, so what happened last weekend..... well, I went to London for the weekend for a family's friend wedding. It was strictly by invitation only nah, I was suppose to go with Mum but she didn't end up coming so I went with one of my fav Londoners Jelony. Off we went to one of the posh areas in London,  Bayswater, Porchester. Nice venue, nice food, nice music etc. It was niceee.. Until,well rewind.

Briefly about me, I have a very interesting mindset and character. Most people that know me mostly see my one side of me and think they know me. These includes my talkactive (yes am a talker), my constant  opinions and my expressive attitude and (uncompromising principles and standards).. Now, in my head there are things I see about me, (am posh).lool.... (i am quirky), (am intelligent) and (i can be razz). Now, the side most people tend to sometimes see is my razz side and that tends to come out when am DANCING. Hehe...

Told you once I went to MAYFLOWER, that school is one of the raziest school mehn, dont mind the fake posh people heheh. Mayflower can turn any posh person into RAZZ classic. To be fair, RAZZ has  grades..  For some, you can tell straight from when they start talking, some when they start eating, lol etc etc while some are through other things. Now, some people are generally not razz on a normal day i.e. loud or attention seeker but can be once they are drunk or tipsy etc. My own oh, its dancing  and the beats just gets me, and yes its the throwing of the waist in the air lol, the bend down low, old school (shina peters moves lol). All of this razzness I caught from MAYFLOWER and it never left. I am not shy, (mostly not). I usually dont care about what people think.. Truth is, I cant be bothered to care.

Anyways, on the day, myself and my friend jel who loves to  dance btw, started to throw way (shhh, she dances oyinbo dance lool.. am kidding love u hun.). She can sure move, in comparison, we both dont care about anyone watching, we are expressive maybe mine is alittle too much sha, lol. YES we are AWESOME dancers.  MJ has nothing on us.. seriously.

OK, whilst dancing, coupled with the fact my (tailor just completely messed up my style). I really looked like a goody two shoes (which I am) but don't like people to know that. I wanted a high waisted trousers with a nice fitted top, what she sowed was not what I asked for. The outfit was suppose to be stylish and flattering. Instead it was completely opposite, not stylish and not flattering, but I had  to wear to the wedding because I felt it was rude not to wear the aso-ebi. She rushed the outfit, hence the crap outcome(we will analyse her later lol).

Back to the dance floor, so  me and jel rocking the dance floor away, showing them how its done  with the live music. At first, I was not feeling it, but after a while I got into the groove and I started shaking my arms, shoulders, legs, waist etc etc(I bet I lost 1inch after rigorous dance boi lol). After dancing for a while, I went back to our main table, to rest and drink some water. I looked side ways, and saw  a dude on my left, signalling me to come over. AH, ah, at first (my first reaction, they have started again ohh). He was on the keyboard part of the live band, he did it again and this time (I ignored it completely). I went back on the dance floor and danced some more (I LOVE DANCING). Azonto, alanta ohh, etc me I can like to shake to them all. Thank God for the grace too. So, here we go again, back to the table, this time myself and Jelony. Whilst at the table,  the same keyboard dude beckoned again to come over, this time I pretended it was not me that it was my friend nah. She was looking HOT that day oh...
But on a serious note I hated the signal and I find it degrading at the same time. Now, Jelony didnt know who was beakoning but once she knew, she insisted I went, that dude was not bad looking. Chia, I said NO, pls am not going anywhere. You wont believe this babe was dragging me, as in a whole me,  it was so funny. I kept saying NO NO, but she wont give up, she insisted I should go and speak to him. Before this mentioned earlier before the wedding, she wanted me to meet someone, but I personally didn't just want to meet anybody nah).

Brief explanation, when it comes to certain dudes am at alert, they are alot of opportunist out there that are hoping and hoping and I always make sure am not part of their hope. lol. Personally, I already have my kind of dude I would like to approach me in my mind and with my RAZZ dance, I think some might find it intimidating or put off (am assuming). Not to sound as if am degrading myself, is not like I dance like a bush girl NO ohh. I am a good dancer. Anways, I also dont like it when anyone just anyone think they can just call me with one silly finger lol and ask me to cover over because you want to talk to me, I dont care what you are doing, pls dont call me like that. NAH.. i dont like it. Thirdly, it will not go anyway and truth be told I feel uncomfortable around some people that I can just sense from afar that NO OH. NOT MY TYPE.
Yes we all have preferences.

So, my defensive side was immediately up including my guards. Unknown to Jel, it not like I was running away from the dude cos I was shy but because I really didnt want to talk to him(am not shy like that). I didnt want to be  that person he would have the opportunity to talk rubbish with and I am usually RIGHT. She insisted ohh, no joke, she dragged me all the way am telling you. I even tried to dodge by dancing on the dance floor, she  still came to drag me. I eventually gave in, so I went to talk to the fuji keyboardist, and as I  believed, he said the things I would have predicted.

FK: Why are you running from me.
Me: (Unmentally prepared to be rude) replied, I am not running away.
FK: Can I have your number.
Me: Oh, I dont have it on me, let me go and check my bag (opportunity to run away).

I knew it, it my number ko my number ni..lol. I carried on dancing  and tried to avoid him. There was Jel again, pushing me and I just flipped on her that she should leave me  alone "I DONT WANT". As I was throwing yanga with jel,  I didnt know the Fuji keyboardist was behind me(the live band had rounded up). Next, I knew someone just grabbed my hand, instantly I yanked my hand off his grip, (you see, only an opportunist can  do that).

FK: You said you were coming to collect the number (something along those lines).
Me:  I looked away and was very uncomfortable too.
FK:So why did you lie? (with a yoruba  accent)
Me: I didn't feel comfortable telling you the truth(in my head, what is this rubbish).
I normally dont lie, but sometimes in situations like this, I always make up a story, either my phone is not with  me or  that my friend has it etc because some wont give up.. araggh.. infact it got to the point where I just give my email to the ones that refuses to give up and most times, I say NO I dont want to give you my number.
FK: I would like to get to know you. You danced really well.
Me: Thank you, very flattering.
FK: I am impressed, can I have your number.
Me: (hesitant) I have a boyfriend.
FK: It doesnt matter, I wont see  you again and I would like to stay in contact.
Me: ahhh it matters, I have a bf and I dont think its fair (abeg JESUS is my bf oh).

Well, I thought I had lost him after that, myself and jel danced abit more  and it was time to go home. I was walking down the stairs when I saw his pink top(thanks to my photogenic brain). Boom, I ran out of the hall,  more like I flew  out of the HALL, lol. No, I walked really fast . I was praying to God  that  he wont follow me cos I will be really cross.

I got out and I knew jel was behind but had to wait in a corner for her. She eventually showed up, the dude approached her and   mentioned  how he tried and blah blah and wrote his number down. I told her beforehand not to give my number to him, am glad she didnt. We got on the bus, she couldnt stop laughing,  and I said to her that she  didnt know me oh.. I dont like dude asking me for my number.

In a nutshell, she mentioned  I was being immature for running away and it would be polite to at least speak to him. The thing is talk or no talk it does not guarantee politeness. I  also felt it was not rude to ignore him and I have a choice not to talk to him. Besides, I cant stop at every call, at every signal to speak to a dude and I dont consider that rude(except if I know its a genuine matter, how would I know? leave that to me). If I know you have no hidden agenda, trust me I am as friendly as ever but once my spirit feels uncomfortable or I sense something then its a NO(whether or not am right).(abit of contradiction sha).  I suppose to an extent I tried communicating this with Jelony but I ended talking gibberish because a) I couldn't communicate/articulate what was  in my head  properly and b) I think its harder for some people to understand why I  react the I way  do.

I remember saying to her over the weekend, that I dont like guys like that lol. What I meant by that was, I am not that kind of girl that is always around dudes or feels comfortable to just allow any dude to talk to me or come into my zone like that.Even if I like the guy, that is it, I just like him nothing more, lol ( will blog about it sometime). It takes a while for me to think oh this dude or guy  has no hidden agenda  before I allow myself to relax  and jam my hype. It also takes me a while to feel comfortable around guys  and the only way that I can feel comfortable around a guy/dude  is a) If I  knew the dude before in the past or someone  I know, knows them. You get the drift, there is a link, cos I can always go and ask the person for info.lol.  b) if they behave themselves.  I dont become friends with random strangers esp on the street. It irks me alot.

That is the end of the story.

Thanks for reading.

God is love....xoxoxox

P.S. I was gonna upload a pic of me and jel at the wedding tried my best it didnt happen. Hopefully if she

emails me a version will do  it next time.. xxx

Back in FULL MOTION......

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Hello Sweet people,

Have YOU MISSED ME?? heheh you cant lie ohh, you have, you have, you so have.. I missed you plenty too..

There is so much to say, I have so many posts to write about.

First, Thank God I have rounded up -ish...lol... (but I am free for a veryyyy long time but not so free, I can make more time to BLOG). YAY..

Secondly, I doing more consultancy with my marketing skills now..YAY. well, I hope to put into good use (more on that in a future post).

Thirdly, I miss all my bloggess so I will be doing alot more catching up...(well hopefully, I will).

Fourthly, I want to say a MASSIVE THANK YOU to all that  came to visit and asked about my well being that meant alot, and it showed you are truly a friend... xxxx (I wont mention names, but you know who you are, SWEET HUGS and blessings coming your way..).

Overall, I am thankful to God, JESUS and Holy Spirit for seeing us through,even to this month of September and many more months. We  are not  special or lucky to be alive, it is by grace, mercy and favour and I pray it will not end.
 In fact, recently I have been thinking, is dying a disadvantage?  I felt this way based on the prayer points expressed in church. For instance, if they want to get you to pray "Some people didn't wake up this morning and some people saw this year but not alive" So pray and thank God. Instead of actually just thanking  God for my life and family, I pray for the souls of the departed, because I feel like what right do I have to be here, also thank God for the lives they have  lived and their families  to receive comfort. I pray not only to thank God for my life but to live a life of purpose to myself and others.

Anyhoo, enough of my mindset, I have a very interesting, peculiar mindset so I question things alot not because I like to find faults but because I simply feel we sometimes follow traditions and do things in that way.

Back to the post, so be expecting a lot more current posts from me, a lot more romantic stories and life lesson stories etc. And oh, there is this phrase some people say "Whats new"? and I say nothing.lol but actually there is something new.. God mercies are new everyday. Happy smiles.  But,  I think that  the question or phrase is just so there, alot of things are  new with me, i.e. have gained more weight, which I like but dont like because lol.. let just leave it. Lets just say I hate shopping for new stuff that starts with B. FULL STOP. argghhh

 I will step out now and hope to blog more.

Have an awesome favoured week.

XXX

God is able  and can do abundantly and exceedingly more than we ever hope, wish or dream of.....

He and SHE SAYS YES I DO !!..

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Hello Everyone,

Ok, so am on a blog roll..YAY... be glad ohh... happy smiles.

This is it,  sometimes there are certain things we are just not told about marriages or its sacrifices. Some of us are left thinking it is what we experienced in courtship that we will experience in marriage. But in courtship most people are on their best behaviour to woo us and us to woo them. If you happen to be with someone that is real and opens up to us. superawesome...if you are not with such person, it not soo superawesome. Either way, nothing prepares you more than reality.. You begin to see traces of not soo superawesome in that (superawesome courtship) and sometimes you begin to notice  the superawesome in that (not so awesome courtship). DO you get it???

Well it means, some of us we grow to be ourselves with the person we love and cohabitate with whilst  some of  us might actually struggle to share our space and freedom despite the lengthy and great courtship. There is no fast rule. I think its important to  ANTICIPATE,  FACE REALTY AND  PREPARE MENTALLY all by the grace of GOD.

There is a saying I  know  "you truly know someone when you live with them".

Well to paint a realistic picture, that day you both say YES I DO. It means you are saying to all the anticipated and unanticipated situations that could possibly occur in marriage. Joblessness,  illness, inlaws., loss etc.

You are saying YES I DO, to the  annoying, funny, interesting, challenging, disgusting, uproar, sweet, romantic, irritating, jaw screeching, relaxing, comfortable, emotions running high, I  will die for you any day  moments that will appear in different circumstances.

You are saying YES I DO, to the real person, their ups, downs, happy, not so happy, moody, not so moody, exciting, not so exciting, gives attention, withdraws attention, wants to communicate, but doesn't want to,  understands it but sometimes clueless, listens but doesn't listen, keeps making mistakes, keeps making excuses etc moments.

BASICALLY,  WE are saying YES I DO, to EVERYTHING THAT COULD POSSIBLY ROCK AND ENHANCE THE MARRIAGE.

Its never easy to say YES I DO when we come face to face with reality. Its important that  the person we say YES I DO to,  are worth all the energy, efforts, time, stress, emotions,  pain, fear and LOVE.

P.S. I am not married oh and never have been but its amazing the ministration I get from the Holy Spiriee. I like to think one day I will have a marriage where I can discuss openly the dynamics of our relationships and commitment.I think its AMAZING to discuss openly about the expectations. I love marriage and I think its amazing that  God gave humans the ability,  for two people to desire to make  a decision to be with each other come rain and sunshine, to be good to each other, encourage each other, develop each other, fulfill purpose together etc.

Besides, I like to think with permission and agreement from Hubby, that we will use our marriage as a platform to educate and inform people about why we made the decision to say YES I DO, what we have come to learn and still learning about marriage etc.. I love learning and developing and I think as humans you can never get enough of it...

God is LOVE, and we should aim to love on ourselves and love others too.. Its can be hard sometimes but thank God for grace.. hehehe

xxxx

Spur of the MOMENT......post.

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Hello Beautiful people,

Thank you for the wonderful comment on my last post. Its nice to feel the love..........HUGS.

 I specially welcome new followers and greetings to old followers.

As usual, I do random post on my fb and this is a copied version of what I wrote on there. xxxx



So  does it mean that once the HUBBY SAYS YES, he will not be attracted to another WOMAN EVER?

Likewise does it mean once wifey  says YES, she will not be attracted to another DUDE?

ahhhh u are living in mugu planet if that the case..

HUMANS emotions are  fleeting. We are dynamic in nature and  we are  product of our environment. It  means we are influenced by various factors be it family, religion, education, media etc.  We are generally unpredictable, and  the more time we spend time with  people on our level the more we take a liking to them.

 ATTRACTION is usually a process and it  sometimes  takes time to manifest.  ATTRACTION does not mean you LOVE THE PERSON.  It just means they tickle ur taste buds. In the case of married couple, ITS IMPORTANT TO RECOGNISE why you are attracted to someone else and DEAL WITH . Also communicate it to your spouse.

Attraction does not mean you have to leave your partner and go around cheating. IT MEANS DEALING WITH THE ISSUE, kill the  thoughts, renew your mind and avoid situations that will encourage awkwardness...

IS IT EASY.. HECK NO.. it cant be,  nothing is easy in this life jor... but NO MORE EXCUSES..... its not only a matter of binding the devil, it a matter of praying for wisdom and applying measures and boundaries.

God is love and love on yourself and others too.

P.S. You are welcome to add, oppose and add lol..xxxx

Quick Post.

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Hellooooooooooooooooooooo Everybody,

I know, I know,  I have been terrible, no updates in like three weeks or more that is unlike me, most esp when I mentioned this year will have more regular posts.

I have missed blogging, blogsville family and I know some of us have missed me too (raises eyebrow).lol.

So here is me saying I AM SORRY for the long silence oh... NO VEX. PELE. HUGS AND MORE HUGS. Can you feel it?? well am giving you a warm, fresh hug. xxx

Thank you to all that came to check up on me.. me I felt important ohh. Simple Mee thank you my adopted Aunty for checking up on me always..LOVE..XXX

Quite a lot of things have happened really but my silence was mainly due to busy schedule.

 NEW THINGS that has happened to me so far:

I got a new job and as ever am grateful to God and to all that gave me encouragement in my last post, am grateful.. xxx. (I join my faith with as many as are believing God for one thing or the other, you will have every reason to rejoice and enjoy the blessing). AMEN.

I crushed on someone... YES OHH.. Looks like am finally moving on.. azonto remix....lol... I went for a wedding in London...yelz oh. it was fun. So I met an old school friend (well not really a friend, it was a dude that was very polite and we were  both civil to each other in school  but never kept in touch). I was surprised to see him actually.  I stayed at my friend's Jelony  apartment, her  flatmate a DUDE, invited couple of his friends over. So that was how I saw him. and he was very nice (I dont remeber him being very nice nice like that  but then again he was alot reserved then and he is still now). Anyway, I came out of the room to chuck some ice-cream package away. I was planning on avoiding the dudes right? (I can be antisocial sometimes, coversface). As I stepped out to the kitchen, I stepped into the dude. He was like (hey, with my name pronounced in  one strong BRITISH accent), anyhoo, I didnt remeber his, so I called him tobi or somethimg. But we gave other some warrrrrmmmmm hug..lol. #renewmind#.  We talked for a bit and caught up, I decided to stay after all, sha we all had a really good conversation. In the end, it was time to say goodbye, another warm HUG. I cant believe none of us didn't suggest to stay in touch.. or keep in touch. Cut long story short, we didn't keep in touch  and the feelings quickly withered away (which is good for me in a way cos ermmm i can get emotionally attached really quickly, although I can try conceal it). In fact, my mind will be consumed by that person mehn..lol. I hate it and I love it). He was cute and sweet. and very very very polite. (You can tell the kind  of traits I like  in a guy lol). #

Side note: ermm there is time for everything..but I must  say am happy I crushed on someone else, feels like freedom in a way and there is hope lol..

Oh oh, I almost forgot to mention. am on twitter ohh.lol. I know my adopted Aunty is not soo keen. So far its just there, still finding my way through it. But care to follow me: @Daughterofherking  

YOU ARE WELCOME.

There are more, but my time is up  i.e. time to go back to uni work. so will let you ladies and gentlemen know next time.

Thanks for reading.

P.S. if you haven't seen me on your blog or I haven't  left a comment, trust that I will be  leaving some once I have plenty of time.lol.

God is love, Love yourself and on others too.

                             On the train, on my way to the wedding.... random pose.lol.

                                  On my way to  an event in my Church.....loves.
                                                       

Moving On: Hugely Important.

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Hello Everyone,

I hope we are well. Amen.

Initially, I was going to title this post "How to Move ON". But then I thought, hmmm that abit too ermm over doing it. The method that works for me might not necessarily be agreed with. Although, I do think this post is helpful.

This title is very much something I know about, while they are books that tells you about how to deal with heartbreaks or how to hate your ex or kill them lol.... I think the best book that will work for you is your own book.lol. am being sarcastic btw. In a nutshell, you have to figure out what works for you.
So what inspired this post, let just say its something that has being brewing in the back ground but today its manifested and thought I should share it with the blogsville family.. YAY.. Aweshome. lol. x

Back to post: Moving on means accepting things and letting go, that you cant change the past and even if you had the chance to, it might not have worked the way you thought. Better still, it does not guarantee you will be where you are today if the past didnt happen. Besides, I think its mostly helps us to discover ourselves and how to deal with our emotions. For some of my new blog readers that have not yet read my backdated posts, I have had my likkle fair of disappointments or should I say heartbreak whatever it means. Links are HERE, HERE and HERE. You are in for a long ride ohh, well with reading those posts. x


Basically, I remember saying have moved on and that this is it, accepting it and knowing things happen for the best. I think for me the hardest part which I mentioned was not being friends, this dude in question has not even dared rung me or checked up on me since we had erm gone our separate ways and the last call I ever received was in response to his birthday message I sent him(last year). I wont tell you about the time I stupidly texted him last yr November (blame it on hormones) and I was sent a text back "who is this". Chia.. talk about insult upon injury.I guess I told you.lol.

With my tails between my legs, I jejely got the message that dude had deleted my number, omo time to EXTRA MOVE ON ohh as in...lol. Which I have and still doing,MOVING ON is a process, but we will get there, although getting there does not mean the person is forgotten (actually it sometimes is) but it means you have learnt from it and making the effort to build your life back. I must say its harder if you have loved the person as in gave your all. To be honest, anytime I see his pic or something I get this weird sensation in my belly not a good one ohh, its like opposite of gooey/butterfly stuff. I hate it, and I think its important to recognise it emotions and it will pass i.e. the horrible sensation.lol. Its like one is nervous in a random way but could it be lurveeee lol. I am kidding. I dont think one can ever stop loving once you have but one can stop dreaming and accept reality.

Moving on, is important because it helps you to get on with the future and attend to the present effectively. For some of us, we find it difficult to move on or to accept what is done. Sometimes its difficult but I think its easier to imagine the other person has moved on cos they are not batting an eyelid, so why should you?(whatever their  reasons are). You are to see situations as a learning process too, i.e. its bringing out a character in you or that you are better understanding e.g you are no longer gullible. lol.

The three things I applied to my MOVING ON:

Let it ALL OUT, In big and horrible drops:

One of the things, I did was to have a good cry. Yes oh, I cried out the pain, I had to let it out physically, I didn't want it in me. I had to admit to my fantasies (that I felt were beautiful and didnt come through). Basically, I cried for every laughter, joy, love, peace and sincerity that was shared in that relationship. He was really good to me in the relationship, so it made it even worse to move on at the time.

Praying it ALL OUT in a massive and little doses:

I did some serious prayer too, I could not do it by myself, there was no way on this earth I could face the world. As in, I hated and hated people that seemed happy in their relationship. I just hated seeing couples holding hands, I hated not being happy for people, I hated feeling sorry for people that had broken up, as in serious eyyyaaaa pele ohh, I understand how you feel. Its like a party search business. All the broken hearted club, oya tell me your story, he left me for another person, or he was not ready, his parents said No. etc me ohh he wanted to hear from God. It always seemed my story was not bad until I mention he doesn't even talk to me and or call me and its like eyehaaaa over again. I had to pray, the self pity, the constant 

blame culture, I kept playing the situation over/over again in my head to try to fix things, the constant beef I had with myself that I could have avoided this and that. The constant rubbish and nonsense the devil, his agents and my mind were feeding me with, making me so miserable and withdrawn. I had pray them out, the fact I was emotional, way to emotional had to STOP. I needed God strength for that oh, big time because each time I felt I had crossed an hurdle, it was like back to the same step I had crossed. I had to gain control and in doing so meant I had to be positive.

Owning it and being POSITIVE:

If I didn't want to end up bitter, miserable and lonely and full of hate and jealousy. I had to own the situation. It basically meant, I had to face my demons and I accept my faults, his faults and forgive everything. Boy, was that hard, but I had to do it. I knew I didn't want the situation to ruin my life, better still my love life, am an amazing girl and I know there is an amazing somebody that will love  and cherish moi, lol. Biko, I didn't want to ruin it for the other person too.lol. Kidding. I had to do it for me, I needed to do it for me, there are generations relying on my well being and positive state of mind and being negative will do no good. Besides, I knew I had a bright future and I refused to allow this situation to end that. I was determined, I was positive, I called my name plenty times and said to myself you will get through this. You will become a stronger woman from this, you will learn from this etc. I wrote down all my feelings (now I look back and am like I didn't write that, did I? infact I felt ewww so emosh man, you sound like desperado, thank God none saw this.  I simply felt embarrassed I wrote them as in too emosh, I lol so much looking back now), what emotions does to your brain. lol.

I emailed myself a lot of things I could have sent to him but didn't. I talked about it alot to purge it out of my system(my Mum is the best, she lent her listening ears, my sisters too and some couple of friends, pastors and my GOD). It really helps when you have amazing people helping you through a tough situation. My Mum understood so much and God did too cos He was the one I told, I wanted a hubby nah.lol... so surely he would understand the disappointment my heart felt. Mum was there to pray for me, encourage me and lift me up even hug me and make sure I was eating well and doing work.

Gradually, slowly I began to gain strength, sometimes I would get a little upset from time to time, but I was able to renew my mind and dwell on the good. It makes you appreciate that when we do good, we are not doing for others, we are doing because we have good intentions not because we are looking to keep the person or trying to slave them. When I think about the good things I did, I learnt that we do it unto God, unto our future and our seeds. Sometimes, not everybody we show love and favour to, will return it but we need to learn to accept and MOVE ON. Before you become obsessed with the situation and keep saying to yourself ahahah God take that thing away from him because it was through me he got it etc. Not good.


I also think now, I understand my emotions alot more. I now know the importance of applying wisdom, concealing my emotions and not allowing it to run over me or help me make  silly irreversible decisions.

In life, we all have our fair share of battles, nobody has it easy and none will. But the important thing is to
know, you will not be the first or the last to be in it. You have to accept and let go of the baggage. It has happened, stay encouraged and be a LIVING TESTIMONY.  Life is all about decisions, no body writes your story only you, even God cannot manifest it if you don't give him permission to.

I am done now.. xxxx

Thanks for reading.

God is love, love yourself and on others too. xx

Btw my NEW JAM love it ohh. Enjoy.

My Prayers....

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Hello Everyone,

One of my 360 degree thinking, when I find I cant do anything. I just say my prayer to God about what is making my heart heavy.

Updating this post using my status on FB.

Lord  please be with as many as are passing away right now. I pray you comfort the hearts of as many as are grieving. I also pray you perfect the healing process of as many as are growing through crucial life saving medical surgery right now.

I pray  LORD that you protect as many homes that are getting robbed or being attacked.
I pray LORD that you help as many mothers that are in LABOUR ROOMS most especially IN developing countries that do not have access to basic and well functioning medical faculties.
I pray for as many that desire a breakthrough from You LORD.
I pray LORD that you protect us like you protected the Israelite like a CLOUD of PILLAR BY DAY AND PILLAR OF FIRE BY NIGHT.
I pray LORD for our enemies that have proposed to inflict us with pain that Lord you will bless them because as we pray, YOU WILL HEAP COALS OF FIRE UPON THEIR HEADS.
I pray LORD that you will FRUSTRATE EVERY plans of the evil ones. BRING CONFUSION INTO THE MIST OF THOSE PLANNING EVIL DEEDS.

I pray that you will provide for as many as are hungry.
I pray for as many as crying out for a MIRACLE.
I pray for as many that believe you are GOD EVEN IN OUR DARKEST MOMENTS.

I pray i will always reference you..

In JESUS Mighty and GLORIOUS AWESOME SWEET NAME.

AMEN.

Pls let share the grace.....lol. am kidding. In the midst of the situation, I pray we will always have a reason to smile..

My thoughts with the DANA AIR FAMILY and as many accidents I dont know about...

God bless you.


xxxx