Thursday, 2 February 2012

Marriage: As a Vision 2

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I  will have to take you a on a mini bible study:

Well not to worry, am not delving deep into the whole genesis. Genesis Ch2 vs 18: "Now the Lord said it is not good that man should be alone, I will make him an helper and suitable mate".  Vs 23 : "Adam said this is NOW the bone of my bone and the flesh of my flesh and she shall be called a Woman because she was taken out of a man".  Vs 24 "Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become UNITED and CLEAVE to his WIFE and they shall become ONE FLESH".

Now, I did not see in any of these passages the word marriage mentioned.But it says WIFE, that for me means to be a called a wife you have to married to the person(that is my understanding so far).  First of all, God recognised  there was a need or there is a need for a Man to be with a woman, I guess he knew it will be a very lonely world for him. Besides that, he needs to procreate right??. No, there is more, he needed an helper, he could not do it all alone and God saw that and provided him with a woman. Adam recognises this and I felt he was happy that other than himself there is someone else that he could go on adventure with(seeing that the Garden of Eden might have been huge beyond comprehension). Moving on,  he saw and he knew that she was different as in she is HUMAN. He proceeded to acknowledge her and recognise that she was part of him and was made from a rib in HIM. That is a big deal, I believe this is one of the best recipes for great a Marriage, he saw that the woman represented  him in some way shape or form and he acknowledged that. A man needs to understand he cant do it ALL by himself and he needs an help mate to help him fulfill even better purpose than the one he has in store.

 It went on to say for this reason i.e. Adam acknowledging  Eve, a man would have to leave his family, unite and cleave and become one. For me, that meant that all his training,  up bringing, character etc is all part of his journey in life to be with his WIFE. Leaving his family meant that a)he was ready b)has found THE help mate which he believes  in. c)it is time to implement his understanding and step up to that part of responsiblity, thus you are no longer depending  on mum or dad or anyone but God and your abilities that you have acquired(this why family is important and good parentship is essential, you are building your child to be great and possibly be an help mate to someone else in achieving a  greater).

In addtion, the bible went on to say UNITED  that is massive. That for me means there is no choice for the man but to work in  AGREEMENT with his WIFE to achieve  a common purpose. The man needs to recgonise leaving both  family to be joined with your wife, he  has to be UNITED, concerning whatever that is happening(although advice from parents are  good and sometimes crucial, be wary and apply WISDOM).

CLEAVE  means to hold on, the man has to hold on to his  wife and never let go. ONE flesh: to be one flesh in literal terms for me means one body, one mind and one soul. Everything in essence has to be shared and as in everything including your positive/negative thoughts has to be shared, responsibilites, work load, up and downs, joys and sadness, every single thing has to be shared. ONE FLESH is to be ONE although disagreements/conflicts will occur, it cool but its does not take the fact that both are ONE FLESH so sort it out.

Finally, I believe God had/has a  vision for marriage, surely he must have felt this would benefit both of them and must be good to be together and do things together and eventually not sepereate. As JESUS highlighted in  MARK 10 vs 9: Therefore, what God has joined together let no man seperate". For me this means, you have propsed in your heart to fulfill one of God visions which is to marry a wife/husband, you are following what God set out in the beginning  to achieve i.e. it is not good for  a man to be alone, he needs an helper. So, a woman recognise she is made has an  helper to her  potential husband  and help fulfill purposes(that na hardwork oh, but there is grace).
The man, recognises it isn't good for him to be alone and an helpmate is good. Hence, when you declare that you want to marry, you are fulilling the purpose of God which he had for marriage which meant what God has put together i.e. the idea God has concerning marriage,  which he had joined toegether from the begining, it says let no MAN seperate. It is the responsiblity of both couples to ensure NO MAN seperates them. YOU  have to guide, guard and protect your UNION, knowing fully well how you have left both your family to depend on each other by being UNITED and how have giving both yourself to eachother through CLEAVE and becoming ONE FLESH. Hence, one mind, one soul and one body, NO MAN should have the power to sepereate that. IF are your grounded in your mind, soul and body no one has the right to take your mind from you or soul or body. Therefore, it is both couples responsibility to  watch each other's back and ensure their mind is not take from them i.e. not polluted, i.e. soul emotions is shared within the marriage and felt, couples need to talk and communicate, body both  should have access to each other's body and it should not be shared with noone else.

Above, all if both are  ONE FLESH how can a mere man just come and seperate you, it is one party or the other that can allow this i.e. open the door for all sorts(although, the devil will always have plans, to steal, kill and destroy are his agenda).

Based on the these teachings I know it has compelled me not to just jump the wagon and marry anybody. The person in question i.e. the man has to understand marriage and see it the way I SEE it. If not whahala go dey ohh.

Most importantly, I want to involve God as our foundation seeing that he made me a lady to be an helper to a man i.e. HUSBAND. I intend on working on myself to be an helper in every aspects what you practice now with other people is what you are most likely to implement in your marriage. In addition, seeing that the Husband will need help, he has to recognise he cant do it all by himself and me helping we can both fulfill a  a greater and mighty purpose. Above all, we have to work, work to UNITE, CLEAVE and not open doors for SEPARATION.

Proverbs 22 vs 18 "He who finds a wife, finds a good thing and obstains favour from the LORD". God obviously knows woman are incredible creatures, we are good and offer  By finding a wife, you are fulfilling one of many God's purpose and will obtain favour as a result.

Note: that your wife has to be a good thing and you need to see that good and when you see good things, what do you do with it? You cherish it and appreciate it and acknowledge it very well as in you do not mess about it with it. Hence, the favour will begin to come your way, ask men that treat their wives with the utmost respect and love they deserve and I am sure they experience bountiful favours... Obviously am referring to marriages where the woman actually is good to the man.

Continued... Sorry but such a long post...


  1. Loved the way you broke the One flesh part. In as much as the man cleaves to his wife and become one, everyone has a role to play in the union. The woman is in that union as an helpmate and companion to the man. The man has the role of being the team leader. These days we see men who have relinquished their role as a leader to their wives and the woman who should be a helpmate is the leader. This craps up the dynamics of the union sometimes. Like you said, it is important that both parties in the union have the agreement on what marriage is.

    1. Yay... u finally visited.. muwahhhhh for that one

      thanks u for the comment hun... much appreciated.. yes we do. My pray is God will enlighten us and God will enlighten hubby so we can ensure we do it right and well...

      Thank you again for


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Comments, Views, Opinions, Expressions, Ideas etc etc are all welcome..