Wednesday 18 April 2012

Communication!!! WITH YOUR OFFSPRING

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Hello Blogsville, 

I hope everyone is well. I welcome my new followers and old followers. YAY.

I did not intend to write this post, I had other posts in mind to do. However, I watched a program today and it was on anti-social behaviour and bullying etc. Each time I heard someone committed suicide based on bullying of any kind it hurts and did  not sound right. Today, I watched and listened to how a 15 year old boy killed himself because of Facebook Bully and other forms. Apparently, he had never been physically  bullied before, but the horrid names and disgusting terms used on fb wall might have drove him over the hedge. Besides, that very day he committed suicide he had had a fight in school that day. Did he tell his parents? Did his parent notice any awkwardness? Could they have prevented his death? Did they even know their child engages in physical fight? Have they ever discussed the dangers of bullying? Have they made him comfortable enough to talk about anything? Do they even know his circle of friends?  Have they ever discussed about death and suicidal? etc.  What about another girl that was consistently bullied through social network and also ended their lives. It is not only suicidal it is other things like joining the wrong crowds, engaging in the wrong activities, watching and feeding the oneself with the wrong image and media exposure etc. It is a lot of things that just sometimes if not tackled will destroy the lives of our children.

Besides, it got me thinking really deep and each time I kept saying thank God I have This is because it reinforces the impact of dedicating our soul and spirit and mind in his hands. Also  am able to bring any fears before God to deal with and fire prayer to any tormentors.  With that said, we need to play our part too, and communication needs to take place between a parent and their offspring. Seriously, we all know the world is dangerous with evil and wicked people but we have that responsibility to educate our offspring and communicate with them too.

I know I don't have any offspring yet but I sure do know that I want to cultivate the best relationship with them,  that  makes them feel comfortable to tell me ANYTHING and I will have their back through the grace of God.  I have to be aware of what is going around them, with them and in them this is because as a  future parent I feel it is my duty to ensure their  safety is not compromised and individuality too.  We should aim  to form a relationship that hold no bounds where our children are able to voice out or tell us anything before its too late.

My point: I know some parent lead a busy life and the time for chitchat is out the door, because they just want to relax. But the interesting thing about that is "that very life you are working towards is most likely driven for the need to create a better future for your children" . Yet the basic things that we disregard i.e.communication will end up hunting us forever if anything at all was to happen to any of them. We need to have a "me time with our children" and it is important we develop creative ways to improve the communication in order for them to feel comfortable to tell you any issue at all from peer pressure, to molestation, physical, emotional, financial,mental  abuse, trauma, drama, fights, misunderstanding, low self esteem, insecurities and so much more. We have asked for them to join in this earth, surely we need to advocate their right to decent communication. Hence, we should start as early as possible.

Even when they become teenagers it is no excuse. It is paramount to know as much as we can so we are able to intervene before anything takes a negative turn or is about too.

My mum is a prime  example, she has always cultivated a great relationship with us i.e. pray with us, pray for us, joke with us, watch movies with us and share her personal experiences and likewise. She has  educated  us and made us feel so comfortable to come for help whatever the case maybe. I really like the fact that I can go to my mum and tell her anything, she tries  her best to help, support and comfort. Most importantly she prays like a LION like if you dare mess with her cubs, you  berra be dodging because you are about to receive spiritual slaps from GOD. She does not mess around when it comes to communication and been there for us.

I know despite all her efforts, it is ONLY GOD that has helped to reinforce her values and he continues to protect our whereabouts. But I believe communication is a one step to ensure we do our parts as parents and not to have regrets later on.  No interrogation unless necessary, but gentleness and meekness tends to work better than an angry voice and  impatient too. I know I would not be friends with mum let alone tell her anything  if she was constantly shouting, screaming, shouting abusive words or just plain rude. I cant stand such qualities in anyone. I will retreat to myself, this is why  till this day, I can easily show vulnerability if you raise your voice at me or shout without any cause at all or reasons why, because MUM does not do any of those. But trust me to fight for myself, just because I show my vulnerability  does not make me  a MUGU. If anything I will report you to my KING that has plenty  of armies to come and flog you for taking advantage of me LOL. I am serious sha.

I just thought I share this. Please feel free to add comment.

Side note: Start talking with them i.e. listen and understand their point of view. There is no recommended age,the earlier the better. Don't  think it is a lot of tasks, the Lord that blessed us with them will bless us with the strength to do a great job.  I keep using us inclusive of me because I know I will be a parent one day.AMEN.

Thanks for reading.

Pardon the use of offspring.. lol. back to science class. lol.

God will continue to keep us and protect us from all forms of evil.

I pray God will continue to comfort the hearts and spirit of any grieving parents that has experienced the passing away of a loved one.

God is love, love yourself and others.

On a lighter note, KING SUNNY ADE.. IS THE NEW JAM FOR ME at mo. HE is a Legend..


  1. I HATE BULLIES OF ALL KIND! cuber bullies, school bullies, office bullies...whatsoever bullies! I see them as people suffering from inferiority complex, and can only feel good when they oppress others!

    So annoying and painful about of his death....feel for the parents...don't know how their relationship was.....but there is nothing as good as being close to one's child.

    It hurts just thinking of it..really hurts #sighs#

  2. 'cyber' i meant..sorry for the typo.

    it is me Nitty oo! just noticed my hubby was browsing when i took over..he didn't sign out.

  3. lol... i was wondering... who is niyi ohh.. lol. @ nitty. it is horrid that people attack us personally and do not see the harm. Like you said it is feeding their inferior needs etc.

    Well, It is important for us to rise above it and not allow it to get to us... knowing fully well what the bible says concerning fools.

  4. have you pasted the loyalty award..can't find it here #searching#...didn't see it o.

  5. The good thing is that you have 1st hand experience of keeping comm lines open with your parents. It's a blessing. The good thing about my mom is this, when she scolds, she doesn't judge. I hope I can do same

    1. Thank u hun... yes it is an amazing blessing. I think its important we pray for God to teach us on how to be a great parent.

  6. such a sad story that a young life was lost, it is always a good thing for parents to have a balance at home and at work. Most parents chase money and don't know their kids.

    How u de?

    1. Hey hun, thanks for visiting. I am good love.
      Thank for asking. happy smiles.

      Well its sad but we can make something from it. Learn from mistakes and turn a sad situation to a victorious one.

      I do think the responsibilities life has to offer complicates alot for us as individuals. It cant be easy to find the balance sometimes. But I know with God we can do all things with Christ who strengthens us.

      Thanks for contributing.


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