Notions

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Hello PEOPLE,

Shout out to the blogsville family…

Thank you to old and new followers, readers, silent and non-silent visitors  lol.xx

Not exactly feeling great at the moment after reading one of the blogsville fam post (P.E.T. PROJECT)I really don’t know what to say which is very unusual, but sometimes I find silence is not such a bad thing. It doesn’t mean you don’t care but it just seems right at the moment, nonetheless a word of encouragement is better most times.

I pray for grace for us all to live and fulfil our purpose on this EARTH. AMEN. As long as we have achieved purpose then it’s not so bad, in as much as it hurts our family and even the departed, at least we have done our part. (Although, achieving purpose is questionable and possibly subjective/ debatable).

I have been doing a lot of thinking, actually I have done a lot of thinking and probably still doing. I think I have come to an understanding if not a conclusion that many notions/ideas are quite interesting if not alarming in some cases.

Notion1: The idea that some people will do anything ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING to get married is one that I find not only amusing but mentally disturbing. To starts off with, the human attention we crave for i.e. partner, spouse etc is normal but some of us are extreme because not only do we want it all i.e. a spouse, children  etc etc we will do anything or are willing to do ANTHING  within our POWER to get it.. WHY? Is my question, is that the ONLY thing we should be striving for? Seriously.  It got me thinking, so after all that shouting, prayers, fasting, visiting pastors for deliverance, meeting with witch doctors, binding the devil, doing online/offline dates all in the name of finding the ONE. What if the “one” in quote comes and he dies tomorrow, what if?? What do we do then? Or better still he comes and his manhood is chopped OFF, (Godforbid) but am sure there are people with stories like these oo, or how about if he has AIDS or she has  a disease or something…  For me, I think the craziness is becoming too much and concerning because it seems to me some of us are making these mere mortals our gods well prominent gods. 

Note:  Am not saying we should not daydream or desire for a partner, but am saying the motives is questionable and the things/sacrifices some of us are willing to make is just scary.

The fact that some of us think our partners have or should I say have   supernatural powers to maybe cure our loneliness or issues or maybe help fill the VOID is not only alarming, or disturbing. It is PURELY IMPOSSIBLE and so UNFAIR on the other person. Why: should anyone be responsible for your own happiness and wellbeing in the case of a partner, why should a mere man/woman have such a BURDEN that they are made to live and breathe YOU? Lol Nobody in this planet can fulfil you if you are not FULFILLED AS A PRESON. WHY: As humans we are constantly changing and growing and what we like yesterday can become today’s issue.  Besides, the world around us is constantly changing putting pressures on us to match up to certain standards and affluence to an extent. So if you aren’t fulfilled NOW, surely any other forms of fulfilment will be TEMPRORARY and it will be back to SQUARE ONE again. 

To elaborate, we are selfish beings and we will always want although some of us are EXTREME, it does not take away the fact that we are always needy.  So THERFORE, how can we place so much hopes and responsibilities on that ONE PERSON that is a mere mortal,  that can die anyway or RUN AWAY when it becomes too much. I think we should just aim to keep working on us and let it be o jare.

TO BE COntinued.....

EACH TO THEIR OWN.

God is good in the good times, bad times  and ugly ones. 

The Marriage Advisor !!!

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 Hello Sweet cakes,

Yes you.. lol.

So my weekend was fun,  packed with loads of bonding with Mum (she came to spend some time with me). Phew, it is not easy running around cooking, getting food, getting told off for not coming my hair (its mine oh). Also  I must indulge in a conversation I rather just not,  plus I had to teach her how to use  the new touchscreen phone she upgraded to. WOW. Its deep/intense. I love my Mum although the emotional blackmail to get what she wants is sooo not fair but I guess it is what it is. We had small fun sha, I told her (future hubby) needs to be prepared cos I foresee you becoming more demanding lol.. She did compliment me, blessed and prayed for me and my older sis. I have been told my hubby is a lucky man ohh, he will be enjoying my cooking (since a good food is a way to a man’s heart etc something along those lines). Lol. Surely, I have more to me than cooking, to which she agreed. Hehe, she is jokes.

Back to the topic of the post, I met with an Aunty (we are not related, just call her AUNTY out of respect). She has a business and sells goodies, bags, dresses, suits etc all sourced from Italy (home of fashion).  Will upload some her of goodies soon on my blog. X. Moving on, I was supposed to help her with marketing and she ended up telling me more stuff than I bargained for.

Nonetheless Aunty F, started with her gist, how we got talking about marriage I don’t know but it was through a conversation and it goes.

Note: this lady is well described as Nitty Gritty, she no send she go talk am as it is.. lol… so you have an idea who she is. Love you SIMPLY MEE.

Aunty F: No marriage is perfect. Anyone that says their marriage is perfect is not happy and is lying. She argues some people in church should not be giving advice if they haven’t gone through the same experience. She gave an analogy, in the UK, they employ people that have/share similar experiences but have risen above situations to counsel others that are going through it. A case of a rape victim, it is likely that sometimes the victim is suppressed/oppressed by the reoccurrence of the situation.  Hence, the counsellor with their experience and techniques can counsel and encourage the victim because they have an idea of what it is like and know what to say. Therefore, some people in church should not give advice in a matter that doesn’t concern e.g. marriage.

I don’t know if I agree with some of her views but I saw where she came from when she mentioned some people do not tell it as it is. Too much holy holy… I guess.

Some of her points were, I think women should be told what to avoid in a man through real life examples.

Aunty F points:

Any man that does not know how to play with a child that comes running towards him or don’t know how to show love i.e. cuddle. HE WONT CUDDLE HIS OWN.

A man that likes to dress, i.e. fashionable, and everything he wears must match all the time. Be sure if you marry such man there will be rivalry and competition in the house. He will always want to outdo his wife and is jealous when his wife buys new clothes etc.

A man that has too many friends, BEWARE. One or two close friends are ok but too many then it becomes too much. This is because his friends will talk rubbish and I when he does mention his wife and her ways, they will be keen to spice the story up and offer useless advice.

A man that loves to PARTY; RUN, because he won’t change for you, it is already in his blood. By the time you marry such man, you will find that you are left babysitting the children all the time. When you do decide to confront him, he will not only remind you but tell you squarely, that you knew this was him before you said YES. “Old habits die hard”.

After courting a man for 8 years and a disappointment. She crossed out her lists and simply wrote RESPONSBILE HUSBAND which she says she has now.

As for me, I questioned her about the 8 years relationship,  why it took so LONG  and yet she missed it? (I am not particularly FOR long relationships past 3yrs or more). She said she was in denial, she felt, where will she start from. She mentioned that they had arranged everything and the day or week to the D DAY, he broke the news he wants OUT. Well, herself and her family ate the cake and enjoyed lool. She is jokes, despite the disappointment she chose to rise above it. It was if she saw it coming, i.e. the disappointment from the guy.

I have always said what you see now with your bf/gf now, multiply  the habits you can't tolerate now by  100 not 10  (when you two marry)  IF YOU CANT HACK IT NOW, PLS RECONSIDER your options cos ermmm it is your own marriage only. If he/she  is violent, no more excuses, if he/she is a cheat no more excuses, if he/she lacks respects no more excuses,  if he/she lacks moral and values no more excuses, if he/she is not fully committed no more excuses.  In  a nutshell, if you know you are living in denial then it’s time to wake up and “smell the burnt okra”. Lol.

But, sha there is nothing prayers can't not do.

I think her advise/points applies to both sexes.

So what do you think?

God is LOVE......

This is for my MUM....

                                         Randomness I enjoy @ work.

                 

The Last WEEKEND....

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Hello Everyone,

How are we?? I hope we are well.

I would like to apologise for the last post. You see, I planned on blogging on a topic at the time. I intended on saving  the title it as a draft as to remind me,  only to mistakenly click the publish button. Anyway, that blog post is coming soon). In the mean time, I will keep you lovelies updated about other stuff. Thank you SIMPLY MEE it was a blog error.. xxx


Ok, so what happened last weekend..... well, I went to London for the weekend for a family's friend wedding. It was strictly by invitation only nah, I was suppose to go with Mum but she didn't end up coming so I went with one of my fav Londoners Jelony. Off we went to one of the posh areas in London,  Bayswater, Porchester. Nice venue, nice food, nice music etc. It was niceee.. Until,well rewind.

Briefly about me, I have a very interesting mindset and character. Most people that know me mostly see my one side of me and think they know me. These includes my talkactive (yes am a talker), my constant  opinions and my expressive attitude and (uncompromising principles and standards).. Now, in my head there are things I see about me, (am posh).lool.... (i am quirky), (am intelligent) and (i can be razz). Now, the side most people tend to sometimes see is my razz side and that tends to come out when am DANCING. Hehe...

Told you once I went to MAYFLOWER, that school is one of the raziest school mehn, dont mind the fake posh people heheh. Mayflower can turn any posh person into RAZZ classic. To be fair, RAZZ has  grades..  For some, you can tell straight from when they start talking, some when they start eating, lol etc etc while some are through other things. Now, some people are generally not razz on a normal day i.e. loud or attention seeker but can be once they are drunk or tipsy etc. My own oh, its dancing  and the beats just gets me, and yes its the throwing of the waist in the air lol, the bend down low, old school (shina peters moves lol). All of this razzness I caught from MAYFLOWER and it never left. I am not shy, (mostly not). I usually dont care about what people think.. Truth is, I cant be bothered to care.

Anyways, on the day, myself and my friend jel who loves to  dance btw, started to throw way (shhh, she dances oyinbo dance lool.. am kidding love u hun.). She can sure move, in comparison, we both dont care about anyone watching, we are expressive maybe mine is alittle too much sha, lol. YES we are AWESOME dancers.  MJ has nothing on us.. seriously.

OK, whilst dancing, coupled with the fact my (tailor just completely messed up my style). I really looked like a goody two shoes (which I am) but don't like people to know that. I wanted a high waisted trousers with a nice fitted top, what she sowed was not what I asked for. The outfit was suppose to be stylish and flattering. Instead it was completely opposite, not stylish and not flattering, but I had  to wear to the wedding because I felt it was rude not to wear the aso-ebi. She rushed the outfit, hence the crap outcome(we will analyse her later lol).

Back to the dance floor, so  me and jel rocking the dance floor away, showing them how its done  with the live music. At first, I was not feeling it, but after a while I got into the groove and I started shaking my arms, shoulders, legs, waist etc etc(I bet I lost 1inch after rigorous dance boi lol). After dancing for a while, I went back to our main table, to rest and drink some water. I looked side ways, and saw  a dude on my left, signalling me to come over. AH, ah, at first (my first reaction, they have started again ohh). He was on the keyboard part of the live band, he did it again and this time (I ignored it completely). I went back on the dance floor and danced some more (I LOVE DANCING). Azonto, alanta ohh, etc me I can like to shake to them all. Thank God for the grace too. So, here we go again, back to the table, this time myself and Jelony. Whilst at the table,  the same keyboard dude beckoned again to come over, this time I pretended it was not me that it was my friend nah. She was looking HOT that day oh...
But on a serious note I hated the signal and I find it degrading at the same time. Now, Jelony didnt know who was beakoning but once she knew, she insisted I went, that dude was not bad looking. Chia, I said NO, pls am not going anywhere. You wont believe this babe was dragging me, as in a whole me,  it was so funny. I kept saying NO NO, but she wont give up, she insisted I should go and speak to him. Before this mentioned earlier before the wedding, she wanted me to meet someone, but I personally didn't just want to meet anybody nah).

Brief explanation, when it comes to certain dudes am at alert, they are alot of opportunist out there that are hoping and hoping and I always make sure am not part of their hope. lol. Personally, I already have my kind of dude I would like to approach me in my mind and with my RAZZ dance, I think some might find it intimidating or put off (am assuming). Not to sound as if am degrading myself, is not like I dance like a bush girl NO ohh. I am a good dancer. Anways, I also dont like it when anyone just anyone think they can just call me with one silly finger lol and ask me to cover over because you want to talk to me, I dont care what you are doing, pls dont call me like that. NAH.. i dont like it. Thirdly, it will not go anyway and truth be told I feel uncomfortable around some people that I can just sense from afar that NO OH. NOT MY TYPE.
Yes we all have preferences.

So, my defensive side was immediately up including my guards. Unknown to Jel, it not like I was running away from the dude cos I was shy but because I really didnt want to talk to him(am not shy like that). I didnt want to be  that person he would have the opportunity to talk rubbish with and I am usually RIGHT. She insisted ohh, no joke, she dragged me all the way am telling you. I even tried to dodge by dancing on the dance floor, she  still came to drag me. I eventually gave in, so I went to talk to the fuji keyboardist, and as I  believed, he said the things I would have predicted.

FK: Why are you running from me.
Me: (Unmentally prepared to be rude) replied, I am not running away.
FK: Can I have your number.
Me: Oh, I dont have it on me, let me go and check my bag (opportunity to run away).

I knew it, it my number ko my number ni..lol. I carried on dancing  and tried to avoid him. There was Jel again, pushing me and I just flipped on her that she should leave me  alone "I DONT WANT". As I was throwing yanga with jel,  I didnt know the Fuji keyboardist was behind me(the live band had rounded up). Next, I knew someone just grabbed my hand, instantly I yanked my hand off his grip, (you see, only an opportunist can  do that).

FK: You said you were coming to collect the number (something along those lines).
Me:  I looked away and was very uncomfortable too.
FK:So why did you lie? (with a yoruba  accent)
Me: I didn't feel comfortable telling you the truth(in my head, what is this rubbish).
I normally dont lie, but sometimes in situations like this, I always make up a story, either my phone is not with  me or  that my friend has it etc because some wont give up.. araggh.. infact it got to the point where I just give my email to the ones that refuses to give up and most times, I say NO I dont want to give you my number.
FK: I would like to get to know you. You danced really well.
Me: Thank you, very flattering.
FK: I am impressed, can I have your number.
Me: (hesitant) I have a boyfriend.
FK: It doesnt matter, I wont see  you again and I would like to stay in contact.
Me: ahhh it matters, I have a bf and I dont think its fair (abeg JESUS is my bf oh).

Well, I thought I had lost him after that, myself and jel danced abit more  and it was time to go home. I was walking down the stairs when I saw his pink top(thanks to my photogenic brain). Boom, I ran out of the hall,  more like I flew  out of the HALL, lol. No, I walked really fast . I was praying to God  that  he wont follow me cos I will be really cross.

I got out and I knew jel was behind but had to wait in a corner for her. She eventually showed up, the dude approached her and   mentioned  how he tried and blah blah and wrote his number down. I told her beforehand not to give my number to him, am glad she didnt. We got on the bus, she couldnt stop laughing,  and I said to her that she  didnt know me oh.. I dont like dude asking me for my number.

In a nutshell, she mentioned  I was being immature for running away and it would be polite to at least speak to him. The thing is talk or no talk it does not guarantee politeness. I  also felt it was not rude to ignore him and I have a choice not to talk to him. Besides, I cant stop at every call, at every signal to speak to a dude and I dont consider that rude(except if I know its a genuine matter, how would I know? leave that to me). If I know you have no hidden agenda, trust me I am as friendly as ever but once my spirit feels uncomfortable or I sense something then its a NO(whether or not am right).(abit of contradiction sha).  I suppose to an extent I tried communicating this with Jelony but I ended talking gibberish because a) I couldn't communicate/articulate what was  in my head  properly and b) I think its harder for some people to understand why I  react the I way  do.

I remember saying to her over the weekend, that I dont like guys like that lol. What I meant by that was, I am not that kind of girl that is always around dudes or feels comfortable to just allow any dude to talk to me or come into my zone like that.Even if I like the guy, that is it, I just like him nothing more, lol ( will blog about it sometime). It takes a while for me to think oh this dude or guy  has no hidden agenda  before I allow myself to relax  and jam my hype. It also takes me a while to feel comfortable around guys  and the only way that I can feel comfortable around a guy/dude  is a) If I  knew the dude before in the past or someone  I know, knows them. You get the drift, there is a link, cos I can always go and ask the person for info.lol.  b) if they behave themselves.  I dont become friends with random strangers esp on the street. It irks me alot.

That is the end of the story.

Thanks for reading.

God is love....xoxoxox

P.S. I was gonna upload a pic of me and jel at the wedding tried my best it didnt happen. Hopefully if she

emails me a version will do  it next time.. xxx

Back in FULL MOTION......

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 Comments, Views, Opinions, Expressions, Ideas etc etc are all welcome..

Hello Sweet people,

Have YOU MISSED ME?? heheh you cant lie ohh, you have, you have, you so have.. I missed you plenty too..

There is so much to say, I have so many posts to write about.

First, Thank God I have rounded up -ish...lol... (but I am free for a veryyyy long time but not so free, I can make more time to BLOG). YAY..

Secondly, I doing more consultancy with my marketing skills now..YAY. well, I hope to put into good use (more on that in a future post).

Thirdly, I miss all my bloggess so I will be doing alot more catching up...(well hopefully, I will).

Fourthly, I want to say a MASSIVE THANK YOU to all that  came to visit and asked about my well being that meant alot, and it showed you are truly a friend... xxxx (I wont mention names, but you know who you are, SWEET HUGS and blessings coming your way..).

Overall, I am thankful to God, JESUS and Holy Spirit for seeing us through,even to this month of September and many more months. We  are not  special or lucky to be alive, it is by grace, mercy and favour and I pray it will not end.
 In fact, recently I have been thinking, is dying a disadvantage?  I felt this way based on the prayer points expressed in church. For instance, if they want to get you to pray "Some people didn't wake up this morning and some people saw this year but not alive" So pray and thank God. Instead of actually just thanking  God for my life and family, I pray for the souls of the departed, because I feel like what right do I have to be here, also thank God for the lives they have  lived and their families  to receive comfort. I pray not only to thank God for my life but to live a life of purpose to myself and others.

Anyhoo, enough of my mindset, I have a very interesting, peculiar mindset so I question things alot not because I like to find faults but because I simply feel we sometimes follow traditions and do things in that way.

Back to the post, so be expecting a lot more current posts from me, a lot more romantic stories and life lesson stories etc. And oh, there is this phrase some people say "Whats new"? and I say nothing.lol but actually there is something new.. God mercies are new everyday. Happy smiles.  But,  I think that  the question or phrase is just so there, alot of things are  new with me, i.e. have gained more weight, which I like but dont like because lol.. let just leave it. Lets just say I hate shopping for new stuff that starts with B. FULL STOP. argghhh

 I will step out now and hope to blog more.

Have an awesome favoured week.

XXX

God is able  and can do abundantly and exceedingly more than we ever hope, wish or dream of.....